The Inn of the Grumbling Giant - 18 Neth 4710


Oy, anuva poynt then?

Aye, we’re drinkin to da Jolly Trollkillahs tonoyt!

Whoinafuc izzat, bugger awl I ain’t ‘eard o dem!

Aint eard o’ dem? Das ya Baron, mate! ‘Im ‘n ‘is compn’y, ats veah nayme!

No i’taint, theah cawled The Ticklish Trollesses, zaswut I hoyd.

Ruh-bish, mate, awl ye must be ignor ants oh just plain def! They cawl vemselves da T.R.O.L.L.; dah “Triumphint Reach Of Legend’ry Lances.”

Ohh piss awf ya nutter!

It’s true!

Ain’t nonuvum use a lance, ya yoonitch!

Da Baron does!

Oy das just a big stick!

Whatchyaself mate, das treason!

Bugger treason belch issa truth.

- He’s ejected from the tavern -

And stay out ya mite-buggerin’ sod!

I hoyd dat da Baron ‘n compny ought be routin’ va trolls from undah their filthy troll rocks n sendin em to va great troll pit in da sky royt bout now. Dey been gawn fah days!

Aint a pit mate, issa ditch.

My mum told me it was more loyk a trough

Aye, pit, ditch, o’ trough, sall va same, there’s loyk ta be no more trolls muckin’ about in va farms no more.

Oy! Unless yer countin da milkmaids!

- They all laugh -

Wew, dey set awf whuh, seven days ago?

Seven’r eight.

Twas nine I reckon!

Nooyyynn ‘e says, whuh a loon!

- They laugh -

Ya can’t even count tah noyne, Thumb.

I ‘eard the treasrah can’t count ta noyne eiva though.

- He’s ejected from the tavern -

Royt! Nuffa that!

Oy, I pruhpose a toast

Aye, to va Baron Farland and da six Trollskateers!

- They all join in, talking over each other -

To da Mi’gh-y Trollfeets!

To Da Trollsome Triumphants!

To Baron Bootamos and the Smashing Trollfists!

To Trolls in general!

To Hoarsport!

To Miss Lala’s tihts, ey!? Ey!?

To da Most Hoy Pries’ inna land!

To Trollcrushuhs Incorptrollated!

- Sounds of alarm from outside the Inn -

Oy, whassat?

Prob’ly a foyt at va broffel.

- Heavy footfalls followed by shouts and the sound of splintering wood -



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